What the heck is going on with my kid? Why the screaming? Why? Why? Why? I’m about ready to throw in the towel. Calgon take me away. Someone hand me a stiff drink (or a Mikes Hard Lemonade). Lock me up in a mental institution-or send me to one of those treatment centers/spas the Hollywood stars are always checking themselves into. Somebody do something. I’m half off my rocker, one foot in the grave, and did I mention the large amount of GRAY hair that has sprouted out of the back of my head in the last year? No? Well, it’s there and even though I pretend it’s not, because I need two mirrors to see it, I know it’s there. Anyway, enough about me, back to my screaming child.
Everything has been a big deal this week and the Roc has been SCREAMING and spending many minutes each day in time-out. Here are some examples of the big deals of late:
There’s a car parked in someone’s driveway and it’s covering up the sidewalk on our way home from the bus stop. This happens everyday. He screams about it. Everyday. How lovely that after three hours apart, our first moments together are spent with him screaming about something. Today I contemplated chasing down the bus and putting him back on it. Sigh.
You think I’m making a big deal myself? Check it out:
Mommy didn’t get out of bed fast enough. He screamed.
I wouldn’t let him stand right next to me while I peed. He screamed.
We only had blueberry pancakes and no more plain. He screamed.
His pancake landed in the syrup and it was too soggy to pick up with his fork. He screamed.
He wasn’t allowed to have cookies for breakfast. He screamed.
The bacon was too hard. He screamed.
He couldn’t get a container of cars open. He screamed.
A commercial came on TV. He screamed.
He was only allowed to watch one show on TV. He screamed.
He put his foot through the wrong hole in his underwear. He screamed.
We needed to go to Walmart. He screamed.
He didn’t like the music in the car. He screamed.
He wanted me to turn left when I needed to turn right. He screamed while we were turning right.
The barbershop pole was not spinning (because it doesn’t spin). He screamed.
He hit his hand on the car door jumping out of the car. He screamed.
He had to get back into the car because he was screaming. He screamed some more.
He had to eat lunch. He screamed.
His food pieces were not cut up small enough. He screamed.
Some food touched some ketchup on his plate. He screamed.
He couldn’t get his shirt over his head. He screamed.
He couldn’t get his foot all the way down his pant leg. He screamed.
His sock felt funny. He screamed.
It was windy and cold and we weren’t going to the playground. He screamed.
We were going to horseback riding instead. He screamed.
He had to change into jeans for horseback riding. He screamed.
The Velcro on his new shoes was too strong. He screamed.
A lady followed us into a store. He screamed.
We were having dinner and he had to come to the table. He screamed.
He wasn’t allowed to have toast because he wouldn’t eat his dinner. He screamed.
Daddy didn’t go up the stairs fast enough. He screamed.
Oh. My. God. Those are all the screams that happened today and I’m sure I left some out! I’m so tired.
I’m not looking forward to this weekend when GC goes away for the whole weekend. The Roc and are will be alone, together…
But I AM looking forward to the following weekend when I am going away for two nights with a good Autism Mommy friend. She’s the one I call sobbing and blubbering when I decide I can’t do this anymore and I must be the worst mother on the planet. She’s wonderful.
We are calling it “Christa and Kim’s Mental Health Weekend” or CKMHW for short. As you can see, I’m desperately in need of some mental health!